I took Mom to chemotherapy on Monday. We got there a little early and they brought us into a small room with a chair, tv with remote, and a bunch of hospital equipment. I met Mom's nurse...who looked very familiar to me. I later realized that this woman had gone to my high school and graduated the year before me. They prepped my mom by wrapping her arms in a heating pad...she has bad veins. They finally found a vein and she got a nice new iv. Finally after about a half hour of this preparation she was ready for her chemo. This consisted of her getting one kind of poison through the iv for a little while....followed by another poison for a while......then another one. This process took an hour and a half or so. We learned while we were there that people read a poem and ring a bell when they have finished their last chemo. I thought this was a nice...and sort of touching tradition. One woman rang the bell while we were there...which was followed by a lot of hugs...and even a few tears...I would guess. I almost teared up myself....not sure if watching this woman finally overcome this awful disease....made me feel this way....or if it was because I had my period.......probably more of the first....and some of the latter. I was thinking at the time...that my Mom had 21 more chemo treatments in front of her..........which will take her into the winter at this point. I was longing for the day she would ring that bell. I was thinking that I wanted to be there with her when she rang the bell.

Mom went to see the stoma nurse therapist today. It appears she had a reaction to the sutures. Mom said that they burnt around the irritation to try to cure this problem. See...more burning and poison. Cancer is all about burning and poison I think.

Lately I have been reading Bitch Magazine and listening to Sleater-Kinney, and the Butchies. I've really been into the girl power thing these days. Not that I'm some supercool punk feminist womyn..........I'm just your regular old not really butch....not really femme, 30 year old dyke archivist who likes yoyos, drinking coffee, and writing in this blog. I have just been feeling like I have a lot to vent about...or at least a lot to say about......my Mom's illness...the medical community....and the world around me.